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The Simple Life

By on May 1, 2013 in Life, Lifestyle, Personal

Spring has sprung

Here we are again, ’tis springtime! The flowers are blooming, the weather is warm, and yes, the pollen is out in force, but no matter, it’s finally nice out there! It was a long cold and strange weather winter and now that warm air and color are back in beautiful Eastern North Carolina the days beckon me outside to sit and read. Every year around this time I get the itch to clean things up. Of course this generally means in the usual sense. A good scrub down of my living quarters from top to bottom. It do enjoy the task, honestly. I download a fresh batch of podcasts and snap on my big yellow gloves and have at cupboards, floors and refrigerators. I love the smell of the cleaning products and I gain a great satisfaction in knowing that everything has a good scouring. I’m getting rid of all that has sunk in over the long winter indoors and setting up my space for time that can be spent away. Cleaned once, maintained every so often.

This year is no different. I’m making a big list of what needs to be done, I’m making sure all of my cleaning products are available and I’m downloading podcasts like a madwoman. This year, however, I’ve been thinking about going a step further. In the last few years we’ve moved several times and about a year and a half ago we moved across the state border. Along the way we’ve expanded and contracted our belongings according to how large or small our space was. In this time we’ve accumulated a lot of just… “stuff”. Stuff we don’t need and don’t really have a place for. I’ve also noticed that I’ve not taken a good look at my routines in awhile. Of course there have been changes that I spoke of in my New Years Goals List, but I’ve not really looked at my routines for some time. I want to take some of this time of ‘Spring Cleaning’ and also clean up the other parts of my life that need a bit of refining.

I’ve read a few posts about this idea of simplifying ones life recently and I’m really feeling inspired to take on the challenge of looking through my things and going over everything to really just par down to the essentials. I think doing this will be an excellent exercise in refining my tastes as well as a great way to lighten my own environmental footprint. I’m excited to take some time to analyze what I’m doing and comparing that to what I’d like to do and I’m inordinately excited to get rid of a bunch of the crap that’s accumulated around me for no real purpose. Here are a few areas I’m going to try to tackle in this little life project:

 

  • Product Usage : I ran across a few articles that spoke about this subject that were really inspiring and sparked a challenge in me. Over at Young House Love,  Sherry spoke about paring down personal beauty products as well as consolidating cleaning products. The part I love about her thoughts is that not only did she seek to limit her products but she also chose to make sure those products were good for her family and good for the environment. I believe this is an excellent idea and a great way to reduce my little duos footprint as well as save a good bit of money in the process. My goal for this aspect is to find just a few products that P and I can share that are good for us and also more universal in their application, from personal hygiene to cleaning products for the apartment.
  • Makeup : I’ve been really trying to par down my makeup to a basic routine that is both simple and fast and also just a beautiful everyday routine that highlights and covers just right. I recently read this post by Elise of A Beautiful Mess, she explains her everyday makeup routine and also speaks about how she went through and got rid of the excess makeup she had accumulated over time, keeping just what she wants and making sure it was just enough to fit into a pouch. I love this idea! I was also reading about personal space and small space advice from Erin over at Reading My Tea Leaves and she also keeps everything in a small pouch she can grab and use wherever. P and I are sharing a bathroom again and I do hate that my stuff is everywhere and he’s relegated to a small sliver of counter space. My goal with this is to par down makeup I don’t use and to solidify a makeup routine that is quick, lovely and minimal.
  • Fashion : This one is one that I think will be quite tough for me to do, but in reality will actually be quite easy. I have a personal uniform that I tend to wear more often than not and I’d like to par down my wardrobe to just a few pieces that are great quality, beautiful and fit into my personal style. I want these pieces to be beautiful, comfortable and versatile, I also want them to be classic pieces that fit both my style and can have just a few things aded in each season that are more on trend. My inspiration for this comes from a great book I finished a few months ago called Lessons From Madame Chic by Jennifer Scott. My goal here is to par down to a true ’10 Item Wardrobe’ (as she identifies it in the book) and identify just what I like and don’t like. Also to get rid of the excess clothing that I’ve got squirreled away under the bed and in the closet by donating them to our local shelter. I hate the idea of having so much excess in this area, I also hate that I’ll purchase pieces to wear only once, of poor quality that I don’t plan on keeping. I’d like to minimize my footprint on this front and to nail down my own personal style and preferences. This book has made a very deep impact on this subject in my mind. Here is an excerpt, I HIGHLY recommend it.
  • Reading Material / Information Intake : This one is a BIG project. I’ve got a ton of books around me, which is great, but there are some that I don’t like and still have. I’d like to get rid of those and also go through the magazines that have accumulated in our apartment. If we move again I don’t want to move with so much really heavy crap around. I’ve got too many magazines that I’ve held onto for no reason. My goal is to get rid of the unessential and make some more room on my shelves for my happily long reading list to come. Also in this arena I’d like to par down the information I take in. I was reading this article from Inc. Magazine about one of my favorite productivity experts Tim Ferriss and in the article there is a little pullout titled ‘Stop Doing That’, in it Ferriss recommends “Power Reading” or simply reading headlines and skipping long articles that tend to be 98% fluff and 2% actual information. As a writer I tend to subscribe to a lot of news blogs and I’m constantly clicking on something and just haphazardly clicking my Pocket bookmarklet and adding it right into my queue. Well, as of right now, there are something like 2500 articles in my queue, that’s not including my Safari Reading List. I’d like to get this queue under control and unsubscribe to stuff that I don’t need to read. I have writer FOMO and it needs to stop. Also, my recent Lenten blog hiatus has inspired me to cut back on my blog consumption as well. My goal is to par down what I subscribe too and also be more discerning in what I take precious time to read. Which leads to my next aspect…
  • Email : TOO. MANY. EMAILS. Srsly. Way, WAY, W-A-Y, to many emails. Emails that get in the way of actual email I need and want. Most of it is from various shopping websites. My goal here is to par down what I get and really make an effort to be less materialistic. These emails really feed our national spending habits and I’m not immune. I’d like to limit these to just the shops I love the most and make a point to be more conscious of the marketing I’m taking in. This will help me maintain a less materialistic mindset and also to help me maintain this life of simplicity.
  • Food : I’d like to identify what I really like and start really concentrating on making more meals at home. There are a TON of great cookbooks and websites out there that are geared toward good, healthy food made with simple ingredients. I’d also like to clean out our fridge and cabinets and make sure we have the spices and equipment we need to make this stuff. My goal is to identify favorite tastes and foods for P and I and to start really making a push to cook at home 95% of the time. A more simplistic view of my food and diet will help me keep up my training and really cleanse my diet properly.
  • Routines : I’d like to take a good, hard look at my daily routines and really refine them into a more productive and efficient set. I’d like to refine my hygiene routines and make sure I’m using the best products (that are also good for me and great multitaskers, also good for the environment) and also to make sure to insert more healthy activities into those routines. I’d like to spend more time exercising with weights (not just running for my marathon training), spend more time outside (reading, walking etc) and also spend more time reading instead of wasting time online and such. My goal is to refine my routines to simplify them and to identify and use the best possible products (healthy and green). I also want to spend more time relaxing with activities that are enjoyable and also good for me.

 

All-in-all, I’d like to really just get rid of the excess and make sure that what I’m doing is best for me and also best for the other aspects of my life (financial, emotional, health, relational). I want to be more present, more healthful and more focused. I’m excited to get started and I’m also excited to share the progress as it happens. Do you have any tips? Anything that you’ve found that helps keep things simple? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

PS- This article from Erin of Reading my Tea Leaves about what it means to “be green” has been a great inspiration in this project as well.

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Good Reads: Peony In Love by Lisa See

By on April 25, 2013 in Good Reads

Peony in Love by Lisa See

oh man, i’m so behind on my book reviews! i’ve been moving through some really great writing quite quickly these last few weeks and i’ve got a few to share in the next bit! it’s been a long weird winter and it’s finally (thank the LORD) starting to warm up around the good ole’ east so i’ve been taking advantage of every nice day and planting myself on the EXTREMELY comfy furniture out on our complex patio. that means good books and good cold beer are my companions on my days off. this read was an excellent one to usher me into these warm days, let me introduce you!

first off, let me say: i’m a HUGE fan of lisa see! i read her beautiful novel snow flower and the secret fan a few years ago when i picked it up on a whim before a long plane trip. from the very beginning, she had me hooked. i’ve always had a love for asian culture (introduced by my dad, an east asia studies nerd) and she jumped right into that in the introduction as she began to speak about the intertwined lives of the women featured in the book. see writes with a deft ear for language and her meticulous research into the culture that is woven into her stories makes the environment her characters interact with real in both its beauty and its pain, peony in love is a beautiful story of the meeting place of those two worlds.

 

from publishers weekly:

Set in 17th-century China, See’s fifth novel is a coming-of-age story, a ghost story, a family saga and a work of musical and social history. As Peony, the 15-year-old daughter of the wealthy Chen family, approaches an arranged marriage, she commits an unthinkable breach of etiquette when she accidentally comes upon a man who has entered the family garden. Unusually for a girl of her time, Peony has been educated and revels in studying The Peony Pavilion , a real opera published in 1598, as the repercussions of the meeting unfold. The novel’s plot mirrors that of the opera, and eternal themes abound: an intelligent girl chafing against the restrictions of expected behavior; fiction’s educative powers; the rocky path of love between lovers and in families. It figures into the plot that generations of young Chinese women, known as the lovesick maidens, became obsessed with The Peony Pavilion , and, in a Werther -like passion, many starved themselves to death. See (Snow Flower and the Secret Fan , etc.) offers meticulous depiction of women’s roles in Qing and Ming dynasty China (including horrifying foot-binding scenes) and vivid descriptions of daily Qing life, festivals and rituals. Peony’s vibrant voice, perfectly pitched between the novel’s historical and passionate depths, carries her story beautifully—in life and afterlife.

 

i have to say, the book is BEAUTIFUL in both imagery and in language. see has an incredible eye for settings and nearly every place in this book was painted beautifully with her words. i also love the very human insight she gives to peony in this novel. as a woman, peony is taught that her value lies in her silence, obedience and her physical appearance. as a daughter, her duty is to learn the skills needed to fetch a high bride-price and to bring honor to her husband. as a wife, her duty is to bear sons, run her household and honor her husband and husbands family. in this novel, peony is in a constant battle with herself to remain a good and obedient daughter while also struggling with her own will to experience her life on her own terms. as per her mothers very strict rules, peony has never left her family compound and only hears of the outside world from others coming into their gates. peony fantasizes about taking a trip beyond her gates to see the world around her, but knows nothing of what that world holds.

isn’t this a classic theme in historical fiction about women? while in other novels it’s played into a tired formula. here, see weaves a truly human story of the struggle peony feels in her heart. one the one hand, she must learn the skills she needs to become a good and honorable wife, these skills will bring her and her family honor, something she wants more than anything else in the world. on the other hand, she must learn to think for herself, to become resourceful and understand the power she holds within herself as it is necessary for her to navigate through the afterworld, a place where she has little help and even less preparation for.

as the novel begins peony and her family are preparing for a performance of her favorite play the peony pavilion, as well as her sixteenth birthday. this birthday will be the last she spends in her families home, from the day she turns sixteen she must prepare for her wedding to a man she has never met. during a quick walk for fresh air midway through the plays performance peony meets a stranger, a young man that has come to the performance as a tribute to peonys father. he is handsome, inquisitive and totally unlike any the men her father and mother have told her of, peony falls deeply in love and over the course of the plays three day performance she meets him each night culminating in a moonlight meeting on her families lakeside pavilion. with each meeting peony becomes more and more lovesick and with the end of the performance festivities, comes the end of the meetings with her love. when her mother notices her dirty shoes on the last evening of the play she locks peony into her room where she will await the arrival of her wedding day. this begins her slow and painful withering away as she starves to death in the throughs of her lovesickness until finally, SPOILER ALERT, she dies. from here the novel steps into the spirit realm, born in chinese culture and ruled by superstition, spirit bureaucracies and family offerings. peony must learn to navigate this forgone world and comes to terms with what has happened to her and what happens in the world without her.

the story is one of highs and lows. as a woman, i feel a deep kinship with her as she must learn to navigate a world that she doesn’t have much control over. yet as a westerner and a woman far removed from the strict social order of her time, i find myself both fascinated and appalled at the experiences of her everyday life. featured prominently in the story is the tradition of foot binding, a practice that entails a breaking of the bones in the foot and a reshaping of those bones through tight wrapping in order to create the smallest foot possible. the women call these their delicate “lily feet” and speak about the difficulty that they have in walking long distances, yet strive to maintain these tiny feet and master the art of the graceful “lily sway” as they walk. there is a particularly vivid scene where peonys mother must step in and correct a malformed binding and re-break and wrap the feet of one of her nieces so that her binding may heal properly and bring honor to her family. in the novel, the binding is portrayed as an act of defiance on the part of these chinese women in an effort keep their cultural traditions alive. as the world outside opens up and more women are being published and let out into society, peonys mother maintains a strict interpretation of the “four virtues” and the “three obediences” which govern the lives of women.

throughout the novel peony struggles with this strict upbringing, even as she navigates the afterworld on her own. as she learns what she can an cannot do in the ghost realm, she learns more and more about the secrets her family has locked away and the world beyond her compound by the lake. she meets other lovesick maidens who have starved themselves to death and learns the harsh reality of her death as an unwed woman. she struggles as she is seemingly forsaken by her family and moves her attention to that of her moonlight lover. through the years she spends as a ghost she matures in her knowledge of the world around her and embarks on her own quest to redeem herself and join the ranks of her families watchful and respected ancestors. it was difficult , sometimes, to read about the way women were treated during this time. i found myself angry as peony languishes at the viewing terrace, caught between the world of the dead and the world of the living. she was unwed, her value was only with her family and her family could not worship her as an ancestor in her unwed state without bringing down the wrath of others who saw her as little more than a vessel for sons. it makes me appreciate how far we’ve come in our thinking, to value and support a woman is to value and support the accomplishments she can attain herself. it also supports the children she may bear by instilling the importance of love, education and  a desire to better oneself.

all in all the book was lovely. reading past the patronizing that is prevalent in the first half of the book revels the incredible depth of heart in the second half of the story. it seems that peony became the woman she truly was only through the struggles she overcame in journey to redeem herself in her own eyes. it is indeed a classic coming-of-age story that can’t be missed for those who enjoy historical fiction, and a definite can’t-miss for those wishing to read of the lives of women throughout time. i think, beyond the story being a really beautiful self-redemption tale, the portrayal of beautiful, strong, well-formed female characters is enough for me to give this book a solid 4 out of 5 stars.

 

for more reviews and to link up with me, join me over at goodreads.com!

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What do 2 Chipotle burritos, 26 eggs and 50 strips of bacon have in common?

By on April 20, 2013 in Film, Foodie

 


i mean, besides being DELICIOUS.

they’re all about 2000 calories!

i was catching up on my blog feeds today and ran across this article from the kitchn (apartment therapys foodie blog) and was just FASCINATED by this video from wiseGEEK! i always have a hard time with diet literature because i find it really hard to visualize what calorie count entails. i know it’s the sum calories of the food we eat and the measurement for it should be on the lower side of the equation for healthy living and weight loss. but really, looking at something, i know some things are heavier in count than others, but i got nothing on whether or not it’s good for me. this may explain my bojangles blindness, it’s ok to have that stuff everyday, right? *jkjkjkjkjkj*

anyway, how fascinating! it’s cool to have a gauge of what something is versus something else. i’m working on a marathon training regimen and as i hear, diet has something to do with that. so as P and i pour over recipes and try to find ways to introduce A LOT more healthful eating habits into our routines, seeing this just makes the process all the more fun!

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Movement and Location

By on April 15, 2013 in Personal

movement and location

 

restlessness. sometimes i feel like i will never escape it.

it creeps up through my feet and settles deep into my soul and saturates my dreams with thoughts of what life would be like in new places.

i’m feeling it again. only this time, P is starting to feel it too.

we’ve been living here in north carolina for a little over a year and a half and we’re starting to feel a steady current moving us elsewhere. it’s something that is really REALLY exciting but it’s also strange and scary at times. we’re feeling a pull to move overseas, to places we’ve never been but dream about all the time. we’re also feeling a tug to move back to a place we truly love: charleston. we’re thinking in future tense, which is nice, but we’re also thinking about what we want to experience in our lives. so many of our friends are pregnant right now and we’re both feeling a pressure to join them in their paths. it’s confusing and, honestly, draining. we’re not there yet. the desire isn’t there yet. we’ve entered into this really beautiful sweet spot in our relationship where we feel both challenged and present as well as ready and willing to take on adventures. we’ve got a list of places we want to go, we’ve got plans for what we want to do, we feel like a team and we’re finally feeling like we’ve got an idea of what we want our life to look like. the thing is, it doesn’t look like everyone else’s. we talk about our future and it doesn’t include settling down, buying houses or planting roots. not yet at least. we have a deep DEEP desire to live overseas. we want to take this time that we’re young and free of extraneous burdens that would cause us to need to be still and settled. it’s just not us. we’re feeling the pull to move. again. to seek out adventures and to:

 

“live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practise resignation, unless it was quite necessary. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, and reduce it to its lowest terms, and, if it proved to be mean, why then to get the whole and genuine meanness of it, and publish its meanness to the world; or if it were sublime, to know it by experience, and be able to give a true account of it in my next excursion.”

 

we’re ready to take on the challenge of selling all of our things and jumping on a plane to a new place. we’re ready to live deep, to feel our lives and to experience the challenges and joys that lie in our path. we don’t want an ordinary life, we want something different, something more. i have a feeling that what is coming will be bigger than what we ever dreamed it would be. i’m so thankful, so blessed to have a partner in life that is as excited about the adventure as i am. i’m so excited that we get to dream together and experience this adventure together. i’m not going to lie, i can’t wait to see what happens next!

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New blog love!

By on April 12, 2013 in Observations, Resources

blossoms

 so, we’re at the end of my lenten experiment. how times flies when you’re not being a voyeur in other people lives! now that i’ve gotten back the ability to look at whatevathehell i want, i’ve found that more than half, HALF!, of the blogs i was reading before no longer interest me! good thing i had all this time to develop crushes on new blogs! here are a few new blogs i’ve been having my lenten affair with over the past several weeks that have made it into my permanent rss “everyday reads” folder:

 

  • new domesticity – could i have referenced this one more? let’s see, emily and her lovely insight have popped up on 1, 2, 3, 4, annnnd 5 (written in reference to emilys tweet). ya. blog crush BIG TIME. i love how emily shares about the new culture of domesticity that is popping up everywhere these days.  her intelligent insights shed light on a how my generation is having a love affair with the “lost domestic arts” of our great-grandmothers generation and how that fits into our modern lives. i’m fascinated by this culture as i am so very NOT domestic in nearly any capacity. however, the way a lot of bloggers portray it, it does sound lovely. take a look through the archives and enjoy the range of topics covered from emilys point of view and join in on the incredibly insightful and interesting discussions. you’ll love it, i swear!
  • and then we saved – a personal finance blog! by a young professional! one who isn’t a banking pro or trust fund kid! one who is real! one who GOT HERSELF OUT OF DEBT COMPLETELY! talk about inspiring! i came across this one from a recommendation by a friend and fell HEAD OVER HEELS! blogger anna posts candidly about her thoughts on finances and her journey from debt to free and clear with humor honesty and more than a pinch of humility. i so SO love the voice and message of the blog! she’s inspiring in her pursuit of honestly pulling herself up by her own bootstraps and discovering the freedom that debt free life brings. as one who is working down student debt as well in this sort of totally-commited-very-little-new-stuff sort of way, it’s really encouraging to read someone who made it through with grace and has great tips along the way. i’m a little over halfway through my student loans and reading her thoughts is a great boon to keep pushing forward to the finish line! check it out, there aren’t many good websites out there about personal finance that aren’t patronizing or geared toward and older population. this is a true gem!
  • the everygirl – i think this is technically a lifestyle blog but it’s geared toward young professional women and deals with career, finances and life in a really fun and engaging way. it features interviews with a range of professional ladies who offer honest career and life advice and seeks to better its readers by featuring honest and timely information on jobs, money and professional life. i love this site specifically because it targets professional women. a lot of the lifestyle blogs i read are older or younger women who are moms or stay at home creatives featuring kids, crafts and fashion, they don’t speak to a professional lifestyle and don’t really deal with topics like work/life balance, money, budgeting and career. it’s refreshing to read a site geared to my age group and professional aspirations.
  • the hairpin –  oh man, feminism/beauty with sarcasm/life with a dollop of self deprecation. the hairpin is awesome on a HOST of levels. i’ve mentioned my love of reading the ‘ask a clean person‘ feature, but honestly, this is on my iPad everyday list. i check the front page and love the perspective, the humor and the grace.
  • double x – feminism. on slate. nuff’ said.
  • cnn belief blog – oh man, talk about some insightful and well constructed posting! this one is geared toward essays on a range of topics having to do with belief (or lack thereof). i love this blog for its range of voices, not just one religion or denomination, but many MANY scholars and teachers from every tradition in one place. i ran across this during some research on the rob bell vs. christian culture debate and gained a lot of insight into what the field looked like in this particular issue. this one is a great way for me to be able to step back and see what is going on in the landscape of religion without feeling like i’m being evangelized to by any one person.
  • speaking on belief, i’ve been a subscriber of tricycle and shambhala sun in print form for quite some time, since my online reading list was cut down so much i took some time to enjoy the websites for these publications and fell in love with them all over again. an excellent resource for buddhist writing and encouragement.
  • door sixteen – oh man, OH MAN, i can’t say ENOUGH about how much i love this blog! blog editor anna writes about her life and adventures in renovations in nyc. i love LOVE LOVELOVELOVELOVE her style and taste! a great read for anyone of the modern/minimal/euro design set.
  • freakonomics -  i love economics. and weird data. this is that x awesome!
  • it’s ok to be smart – a FANTASTIC science blog by joe hanson. so much fun and interstingness!

 

phew. yep. so there are a few of the blogs that have been added to my rss feed to take the place of those lifestyle blogs i dumped. honestly, it feels good. i feel a bit ashamed of how deep in i got with some of the blogs i followed, i know that the intention wasn’t to really influence me in some of the more negative ways that i was influenced, but still, it happened. i tend to jump in and run with something i really enjoy and i think what happened was that i saw these incredibly perfect lives on display and sat back and saw the life i lead and found myself wanting. that’s something that happens to everyone at some point, but i let it nag at me and create this dark cloud that would shove in right after i read an entry. taking the time to step back and grill myself with some brutally honest questions in my meditations has allowed me to develop a better picture of my life as it is and what it is that i want to be and to do. taking the time was an incredible gift that i didn’t expect and looking at these blogs now, i can see those cracks and desperate  editing that comes with creating a brand of yourself. honestly, the envy isn’t there anymore. reading about how many of these bloggers have to fight off unwanted advice and judgement and the veneer that has to be maintained in their appearance and lifestyle must be overwhelming. if i have a bad hair day, it’s no big deal, if some of these beauty bloggers have one and they’re seen out, they’re judged for it. i can’t imagine that kind of pressure. also, a lot of what i see now when i read the writing is a blatant self interest and egoism. there is writing about yourself and your family and then there is putting yourself and your family up on a pedestal as a model of what family should be, that’s no good. everyone has a different way that they go about things, one way isn’t necessarily better than another, to look down from that pedestal and proclaim “the best way” is hypocritical and unnecessary. reading more tangible and intellectually stimulating content has really lifted my spirits and engaged my mind and creativity so much more than i hoped. i’m glad this whole experiment has helped me to reframe my view and given me the most unexpected encouragement!

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